Lately I've been thinking about my own limited horizons. What do I mean by that? Well I mean that the values in myself that I typically don't think need improvement create boundaries. We all have accepted our obvious faults (no I'm not perfect ;) haha) but what about our strengths? Are we completely perfect in our positives?
In my mind I hadn't really considered that some of my favorable traits like being caring or trustworthy needed improvement. Am I caring regardless of the circumstance? Does my caring nature end if I'm dealing with someone who irritates me? Does my caring nature end if I'm in a crisis? If my mind is occupied am I caring right then or do I put it aside til it is convenient? Does being caring have a limit on my actions? In all honesty, it does. This doesn't sit well with me, but in being truthful and honest I'm not always caring about everyone.
I pride myself on being a great friend, one that will drop everything to be there. I've done extraordinary things to make life easier for my loved ones...and I'm sure you have too! :)
But what about the person in my life who I clash with? If someone in my life acts in a way that unintentionally (or sometimes intentionally) hurts me, I think twice about doing them a favor next time. If it continues, I care less and less about what happens to that person. Over time I turn off my feelings, thoughts, and hopes for that person completely. We haven't talked in forever but you need the last bit of donations for your charity goal? I have a 'reason' not to.
When I come across someone who has wronged me, is it in my best interest as a person who wants to better themselves to not care if they need a favor? To think twice about lending a hand in a REAL time of need? To look the other way because you don't respect that person as much anymore? A true unselfish favor is necessary, hell..REQUIRED to go past my own limited horizons.
Some might say that not helping someone who has wronged you is a fair and appropriate response to someone who isn't being a valuable guide in your life. I honestly believe in surrounding yourself with positive non-toxic people. I've cut out people who bring me down needlessly. I'm not saying to go back to being a door mat. That was me at one point. It's not healthy! I'm adamant to only let those who hold influence over you be those of supportive and unselfish nature.
These great and usually immensely positive aspects of myself stop on the edge of my own self placed limitations. I have an excuse per say. My horizons seem to suddenly stop and I dance around going past my own boundaries. Why? Because they're already listed as a strength. I don't need to improve. Or do I?
Why do we only try to improve the 'bad'?
Have an amazing and spectacular weekend!
Have an amazing and spectacular weekend!
Very thought provoking and well written! Thanks for sharing, I hope you have a wonderful Friday and a great weekend!
ReplyDeleteI def think we need to work on ourselves and sometimes the areas we think we have covered, are the same areas we are neglecting because "oh it's already a strong suit for me".
ReplyDeleteI feel like I am SUCH a loyal friend and super kind, but you're right, it's to people I feel are DESERVING. I'm not about being a doormat either, but sometimes I have to force myself to do these things for people I don't like as much or I feel have slighted me in the past - not because they necessarily deserve it from me, but because it's the right thing to do (even though sometimes it sucks).
And as nice of a person as I am, sometimes I can be really hurtful when I feel like it and I HATE that. It's not often but I wish it was never!!
So very thought provoking! As they say... the squeaky wheel gets the grease.
ReplyDeletethat's a good question ..
ReplyDeletesuch a great post! something that we do not want to think about because then we have to look at ourselves and realize that there may be areas of needed improvement. I think it's so hard to be nice to those who have hurt us...but I am striving to be! to give grace! :)
ReplyDeleteI definitely need to be working on a few things!!
ReplyDelete